Motivation

I find it hard to be motivated. And I'm sure I'm not the only one. But sometimes I stumble across a video on YouTube and it's motivating. Not the motivation which encourages you somewhat, but the motivation that fills you with determination and encourages you to work to your very best. Middle of last term I was in a bad place. I know it sounds cliched but I didn't feel happy and I just wasn't doing much (I mean, I'm still not doing much but yunno). I was just sick of life and sick of school and family and commitments and everything. Until my parents convinced me to go to youth group. Now, me, I'm awful at fitting in, at finding that place where I belong and I can talk to people I want to talk to. And I went to this youth group expecting not to fit in or enjoy myself with all the other peoples company. But, everyone was nice, just regular human beings. I managed to fit in, and although it took a little while to feel like I belonged, eventually I started to look forward more and more to every Friday, to learning more about God and hanging out with amazing people. These people may not have helped me personally, but together, they helped drag me out of the misery I was sinking into. I don't tend to say it to people I'm still only getting to know, but thankyou to each and everyone of you for helping me. You have all inspired me to become a better person and to stay motivated.

Schooool

It's that time again....
Ohhhhh yes! The dreaded moment in every child's life when the holidays are over and you are forced to go back....
Back to School
Now I've got nothing against school, it's generally okay, but at times it gets tedious, boring and very overwhelming. I'll be honest, I kinda hate school. I just can't wait to get out of it and into the real world with my first job, first girlfriend, first flat etc. Also at the same time I want to hold on to these years for as long as I can. Childhood is a great time of life and it slips away all to soon. I, myself know this as I am turning 16 in a few months and will be able to get my licence. It feels like just yesterday I was thirteen, back in primary school as a technology leader, not really caring about the technology just glad I was enjoying life. Then high-school somehow happened and before I know it POOF! Here I am. I guess all that I'm trying to say is that I'm sure I'm not the only one out there who dreads school, and I'm sure I'll (eventually) get used to it. But for the time being I'm still sick of it, just wishing I could live my own life. It would be a bit difficult living life out in the big wide world as a 15 year old. So while I hate it, I think it's probably best to stay in school.
For now any way.

-Josh

Honestly

I have no idea what life is anymore..... Not that I had any idea in the first place. It's just my life seems to go one direction and then bam! Adds a sharp curve ball and starts heading the opposite direction. And then I'm like, well this ain't too bad, and then something else happens splat bang in the middle of all my chaos. I've been loaded down with homework and internals since week 2 of school. It's been absolutely insane how much work I've done, I didn't know I could do that much work. But yea, things have been reallyyy busy and I'm sick of it all :P

Hot mess? 

Rephrase that to 'mess'

Summer

Summer. It's the greates time of year. I, personally love it, (apart from the constant droning flies) and although it's a great time, it gives me space to think about, well, life. Well I love summer, I don't actually get anything done much. I had planned a few things in the holidays, but as always (for me anyway) the plans went lopsided. I had planned to go camping with my 4 best friends but 3 of them weren't able to come because of arrangements that had already been made with other friends/family. It was still going to be a great time though, just me and my other best friend, Fenella. We had it almost all planned out until about a week before we were going my mum pulled the plug on it because there wasn't enough money in bank to get to the beach/pay for accommodation. It was extremely unfortunate and I was pretty gutted, but life goes on and you can't sit around waiting for something to happen. I did get to catch up with 3 of my friends a couple of days ago, Isaac,Georgia and Fenella. It was great to catch up with them and even better to see how much they had changed and how much more cool they have become (although in truth, you guys have always been cool) the highlights of my summer have been, Christmas Eve, staying up past 2 waiting for Christmas with my brothers. Roadtripping in Porirua with the whole family (all 12) and having a great New Years chat with three of my older brothers about burritos. Another highlight was going down to the tennis courts and playing tennis with my brothers and sisters. One night my second oldest brother Nate took his Subaru for one last boost with me, my other brothers Dan and Jords and one of my sisters Beka. Listening to 'dancing in the moonlight' by top loader staring at the stars as we cruised through the countryside was truly amazing. Longboarding streets with Nate made me feel free and alive. The last memory of my summer was hanging out with Georgia, Isaac and Fenella was great. We played truth or date which was a laugh and included me having a spoonful of absolutely disgusting Tabasco sauce, Isaac drinking a soy sauce shot, and me doing chubby bunnies then singing and acting *thanks Fenella* Anaconda by Niki Minaj. Ugh. I hate that song. 

All in all, my holidays have been truly great, and although I didn't get to catch up with my friends (who I miss like crazy everyday) much, it was still a great summer. So all I can say is.....

BRING ON NEXT YEAR 🎉

That moment...

That moment when you are awake with two of your older brothers at 2 in the morning eating roasted pumpkin and kumara is when you start to realise, that life truly is the greatest adventure you'll ever have and even though there will be tough times, no matter what, you have to stick with it and move on with your life. It will be difficult. There will be problems. But when you're on your deathbed you want to look back on life and think 'that was the greatest rollercoaster ever and I wish I could do it all again'.